Our journey started even before I was born; my mother was a victim of sexual assault when she was a child, she became an addict at a very early age, at around 19. She has been battling addictions with alcohol and drugs for 40 years, pretty much the majority of my life, except the past two years. As I grew up, I began my own healing journey; I’ve had to learn my own self-worth. I’ve also wanted to teach my mum hers.
I’ve been going to Hawaii at least once a year for the past seven years. It’s the most feminine island and it’s helped to heal me and bring me back to my divine femininity.
My mum and I have had this amazing journey together of learning how to work through our own stuff and through the process of me learning how to fully accept her, where she was without needing to fix her or change her, it gave her permission to do the same with herself. Eventually she became ready to express the root cause of the addiction and talk about what had happened and the trauma. When she dealt with the core root of the issue, it was the like the need for the addiction went away; it was almost like she wasn’t addicted at all, she was just suppressing the pain.
So, the last few years have been like me getting to know her for the first time. I feel like I have so much I want to show her and want to catch up on. This January I took her with me Hawaii to show her my favourite place on the planet. This is a sacred place for me, where I go to heal and the island did the same for her too; it was a healing journey for us together and also individually, so it was really beautiful. I was proud of her, it was the first time she’d left Canada, but she was out the door with me every day at 6am. We did hikes into the jungle and it was all surprisingly easy. I’d thought about taking my mum with intention to heal but I decided to go and have the trip be all about fun; the island takes care of you when you are there, so I let the island do the work. There’s more calmness between my mum and me now, we can spend more time together effortlessly.